Many of us may assume the misconception that the decision making process in your 30’s is instantly a breeze. While at age 30 we care less about what others think and are more confident in ourselves, making tough choices at 30 can be just as hard as when in your 20’s simply because the decisions can contain a lot more risk.
Should you buy that new house? Should you relocate to a new city? Should you take on that new job? Should you start that business? No matter what’s at stake, having a plan and actually understanding how to make the best decisions in your 30’s is a must! Follow these tips to avoid self torture and sleepless nights.
Trust Your Gut
Accept advice from your loved ones, but ultimately trust your gut. No one has been through what you have been through nor have they experienced what you experience or how you will experience it. Someone else may think you are making the wrong choice, but no one has to live with your happiness or sadness at the capacity that you will. Therefore, never make a decision because of someone or just because you think you are ‘supposed to’. It was pretty powerful for me to learn that there is no “right” or “wrong” decision – ultimately a decision is a choice that shapes your life journey, and guess what? You’ve made it this far, right? Unfortunately, we’ll never have the full information needed to make the best choice and we can never predict the future.
All we can do is stop second guessing and follow our gut.
Prioritize Courage Over Fear
If you aren’t moving forward on making a decision because you are afraid to take the leap, try to prioritize your courage over what you fear. It’s not about being fearless, it’s about deciding to do something about your fear. Having the courage to do what scares us in life only makes us stronger and better than ever once we prove that we survived. Have you ever noticed how confident you are the second time you do something because you know exactly what to expect? No matter the outcome, trust in yourself, and know that you will make it through. If you need a reality check on fear check out Top Podcast’s for your 30’s, most notably, No Limit’s where successful CEOs and entrepreneurs express overcoming fears that you’d never expect.
Consider the Worst Case Scenario
Many times we find it challenging to make a decision because we fear the outcome. However, stop and consider the worst case scenario. Is it really that bad? Can you turn it into a positive? Will you be able to overcome this worst case? Most likely the worse case isn’t that bad or even realistic to occur. Understand the consequences of your decisions and be honest on what’s the worse case scenario.
Remove Emotions & Identify the Facts
Emotions change from day to day, situation to situation and opinion to opinion while facts usually remain constant. If you are contemplating a move, one moment you may feel bad to disappoint your biggest supporters with your choice and another moment you may think that you will never find supporters like them again if you move. Emotions can become noise, so discover what is 100% fact, i.e: if you move, you will have a job that’ll provide a 25% salary increase.
Make a Pros & Cons List
Don’t sit down and build a list at once, create a list over a few days or hours. This will give you time to think about all of the pros and cons as different things pop into your head. I’ve mostly found this as a way to get my thoughts on paper in an organized format – not a way to pick the decision with the most pros. This is because in reality for every pro you’ll naturally find yourself coming up with a con and vice versa.
DON’T OVER analyze
Going back and forth with yourself can cause unwanted stress, anxiety and sleepless nights. I’ve found that no matter how much I analyze the situation, my gut instinct never changes. Over thinking has caused me to lose my appetite, push out loved ones and become very stressed when I could just learn to trust myself from the very inception of the decision making process.
What Would Your Future Self Do?
So it’s your 90th birthday and you are looking back on your life, which is the choice that you would be most proud to say you made? Which decision is better aligned with who you are and what you want from life?
Don’t Look Back
Make a choice and stick to it. Flopping back and forth in your mental or physical state will just confuse you further. Let it go and trust that God will work everything out.
It’s no secret that making certain decisions in your 30s or at any age can be tough. We never have all of the information and many times we are taking a gamble, which is part of life. Our emotions play a big role and can sometimes cloud our judgement. The unfortunate, yet fortunate truth is that at this age we are faced with big life decisions and all we can do is make the very best choices and navigate the results – good or bad. The good news is seeing your decision through can be very rewarding and worth all of the struggle.
What tough decisions have you faced and how did you overcome it?